I don’t know how many editions of “You might be a mom like me” I’ve published so far on this blog, but I just keep coming up with ideas along these lines as every day I trudge through my everyday of laundry, cooking, procurement of supplies to keep the family going, Disney channel, and board books. So here’s yet another installment! (Perhaps my conscience is telling me that this should be the topic of my continually upcoming and largely mythical “book”?) You might be a mama like me…
… if washing a load of towels and undies on “hot” and “heavy” isn’t as exciting as it sounds at your house, either.
… if one little spray of Windex reassures you that, yes indeed, you are making real efforts to clean the house.
… if you’ve ever washed the same load of laundry more than twice because you keep forgetting to put it in the drier.
… if you have to tell your husband things like, “Yes, you can spray it with Febreze, and it will smell better for a while… but it won’t be clean.”
… if your to-do list for Thursday is the same list you made and planned to accomplish before lunch on Monday.
… if the UPS man has ever said, “Well, I better get going…” right when you were in the middle of a conversation at him!
… if nap time is a vague and blurry thing, like an oasis in the desert which you hear other people talk about but you’re not sure if it’s real or not.
… if you’ve gone entire days without so much as sticking your head out the door because, as you’ve realized, there are only four days a year in Montana that are appropriate for little kids to be out in the weather.
… if you secretly wonder what visitors think your house smells like.
… if the theme songs of certain cartoons pop into your head at stressful times, as though your subconscious is telling you, Just turn it on! Just turn it on!
… if you’ve ever stepped in a puddle of pee which you didn’t know existed.
… if you know now that it’s not a good thing to let your 6-year-old be alone in the shower with a full bottle of soap.
… if you and your husband regularly have to use hoodie towels to dry off after a shower — because there are no (repeat, NO) clean adult-sized towels.
… if you find random puzzle pieces and you’re not even sure if you have the puzzle which that piece would GO to.
… if you’re secretly looking forward to the time when your kids are old enough to make up their own birthday party games… like something as simple as catch with a football.
… if you’re pretty sure someone is going to slip on a pile of Mardi Gras beads on your floor some day and break a neck.
… if you long for your kids to sleep… but then worry if they’re feeling okay when they do sleep.
… if your kids eat as much paper and plastic as they do candy on Halloween night.
… if you’ve come to the conclusion that from now on you’ll just buy the girls matching clothes and completely take competition out of the equation.
… if you just can’t believe your kids like mustard… and you kinda think they do it just to gross you out.
© Tami Blake